So I’m going to put some weight on this Christmas

billygean ♦ December 23, 2006 ♦ 2 Comments

Just as my Dad and I reach the check out he turns to me. “Can you get a paper?” he says.

“Which one?”

“The Times, or the Telegraph.”

“I’m not buying the Torygraph,” I say.

“Fine,” he sighs. “The Guardian then.”

Feeling tribumphant I wade through the Christmas shoppers. As I pass the freezers a blonde girl who comes up to my knees tugs on my coat.

Feeling slightly uncomfortable, because it’s a child, and I don’t know how to talk to them, I bend down. She has enormous brown eyes. She hands me a tub of ice cream and walks off.

I carry on past the freezer section and walk round a couple in the aisle.

“She went that way,” one of them is saying. “I can hear her calling.”

“Are you looking for a blonde girl?” I say, pointing them in the direction I saw her.

“She alright?” the woman says.

“Fine,” I smile. “She gave me some ice cream.”

“Sounds about right. You look like you need it.”

That’s the last time I retrieve your child then, I think as I stand in the aisle.

“Jeff!” she shrieks. “That’s not her, this lady says she over there!”

You have to wonder, don’t you?